So, belatedly here we go, it's 6 in the morning on christmas day, and I've been woken up needing the toilet desperately in the way only spending a good evening with mates can lead to, my sleeping is fairly wrecked courtesy of the W.M Morrisons workhouse nightshifts which're ruling my life, so I may as well do something productive I guess.
DisclamerThis shit's going to be epic, for those with short attention spans there'll be lots of pictures, don't worry!
But first; a short, from roaches studios!
24th Oct:
Bob Gaskins on some problem about cow poo:

Bloody amazing sunset:

Ticklist: Some stuff on cowcutter buttress and the worlds hardest sidstart further up the crag.
The Main Feature To background the trip: Little finger injury(serious) = no crimping for me, 6 weeks off, heavy, pants basically, with only my crutch of the ability to heelhook and knowledge of how to flag when campussing left in the bag Myself and Bob set off to sunny (mhhmmm...) France.
In chronological order:
Packed car, pretty sunsets!
Arrived, made the first of many carpark dinners to come, went to sleep under the boulder that'd become our bivvy for the next 3 weeks.
Day 1, 27th OctAmazing weather, slightly too hot if anything; Bob and I sent Retour aux Sources, absolutely amazing 7a, set a benchmark for the rest of the trip, font's made of them!
Linky:
Vimeo
I sent Rude Boy, another brilliant 7a, got a video of this one as well.
Vimeo28th OctReturned to the rude boy bloc for Bob to have another go, I sent Les Pieds dans la lune, powerful little number with a cruxy undercut move, 7a+, was just happy that my finger wasn't holding e back too much.
I also tried 'Sans Dessus Dessous, which was to become the subject of a bit of an epic, more about that later :)
29th Rest day, 30th Rain, 31st The Magic Cul De Chien (/'Dog's Arse' according to Bob's local lingo)Arabesque bloc, I did Le Retour de la chenile (7a+) 2nd go, which is nothing but a horrific mantle, absolutely amazing, complete grovel, win!
Both of us spent a considerable time fannying around on Arabesque, which I'd seen the honourable Mr Mills laying on last trip to font a couple of years back, it was just as good as I remembered, and just as powerful! We both got some significant beta knowledge from sheer amount of goes, it felt beyond me though, which I think was pretty much solely down to lack of fitness post 6weeks of and being heavy/generally not in the best climbing shape.
Then headed to the Roof of the cul de Chien for Bob to have a go, as it's mega classic, I did it once more, this problem was my first 7a (done after my first 7b on the same day, last day of last font trip) so it's always going to be pretty special, personal sentiments aside I genuinely do think it's the best 7a I've ever done or tried in my life. Bob didn't have any luck on it due to skin issues, courtesy of the time spent on Arabesque on a fairly greasy day.
1st - Rest dayCar park Activities, the first of many days of entertaining ourselves!
2nd - Cul de Chien againMore time spent on arabesque, both Bob and I got to the big slappy crux a number of times, getting our beta more wired as we got more tired, good session, just a hard move, no cigar again.
As as we both got we agreed not to come back for a while, due to the matching destroyed knees as a result of the powerful kneebar move, it turned out it took all of 3 weeks to heal enough to try it again!
3rd - The beginning of the RainThank god for our quality Bivvy Rock! Pissed it down, unmercifully, for days!
5th - Sunny window, went to Mont Pivot, amazing problems, far too warm! Unfinished business here aplenty for next time!6th-10th More Rain!IL PLEUT! Whilst it rained we kept ourselves occupied checking out Chateaveau, Gorge aux Chats, Franchard, L'Elephant, Rocher de Corne Biche and Petite Bois, along with a healthy dose of sitting in the car reading. Despite the rain font managed to remain pretty beautiful, esecially during the 3 days of most ridiculous intense Autumnal vibrancy imaginable, try this on for size:
11th - Gorge aux ChatsSent Sa Pelle Au Logis (7a+), third go, should've been first, brilliant little problem, started raining heavily just as I hit the last hold! The discovery that this area dried fast was definately one of the winners of the holiday, especially as it was a short drive away from our home in 'Le Croix au St Gerome' carpark.
BOAR!Heard and saw a boar whilst walking to the bivvy, both pissed ourself, but it was pretty cool, big bastard!
12th - Gorge aux ChatsBob Worked on Sa Pelle Aaux Logis, I did La Parre Dessus, and Stormroc, both 7a+, both 3rd go, Stormrock was just like being on the grit :), both sent in the spitting rain before all hell broke loose and the heavens opened, Il plus pleut!
13th Cuvier Rampart EstBy this stage I especially was getting so tired of the rain that I was going to climb every day it was possible, rested or not, the rain was pretty frustrating, I was determined not to be beaten by it though.
Before it rained again I managed to do 'Big Mama Assis' - a highball 7a, all the hard work low down, much easier as you go, properly pleasant stuff, I found the bottom very hard, which I think was due to having shortarse legs, not complaining though, as the shortarse beta involved a pretty nice slappy dyno, great stuff, thoroughly recommended, amazing highball.
14th Rain, 15th - Rocher Greau, The Return of the BobMan this place is good, park in the centre of town, next to the Hotel de Ville, turn around, see park, climb! Absolutely quality venue, really looking forwards to going back.
Bob rediscovered his form and we both sent a couple of brilliant overhanging problems, both of which I snapped a video of him doing. Oliver Twist (7a) was first on the bill, another climb where I found the crux was at the bottom, aided by lack of reach, solved it with campussing, bob opted for some pretty powerful slappy toe-clamp beta. After that was Le Jea t'es Fou, which I managed to somehow get very scared on, despite good spotting, plenty of pads, and a flat landing, I've found that this occasionally happens post ankle incident, it's happening less and less but certain moves irrationally have the ability to turn me into a complete wimp! Bob didn't have any trouble on this one either.
Oliver Twist:
VimeoVimeoLe Jea t'es Fou
Vimeo'Commitment stomach':
16th - Rest, 17th Cuvier ChatillonThis place has so many short overhanging burlfests! Definitely one of the areas I'm looking forwards to returning to the most in font. It also contained one of the few problems I'd put on my 'to try' list, having seen a video of the ever prolific Neil Hart doing, and thinking it looked amazing - 'Bleau's Art'.
It's a shame I didn't have the video fresh in my mind, because I spent a good hour and a bit trying it a ridiculously hard deadpoint way, removing all of my skin, and getting no closer to what I thought was the crux.
Meanwhile bob was trying a fairly fierce looking crimpy wall, again short but sweet, that wasn't in the guide, we assumed it was 6c+ or thereabouts, as it was pretty tricky and reachy, despite being low on height, he managed to send it using some late discovered beta, which was unsurprising as the thing was covered in holds, they were just all rubbish and there was nothing for feet :)
However, as is so often the case I discovered some betta beta whilst knackered, and despite the none existent skin and lack of power left managed to send it, good thing it's short and sweet! Sweet it is as well, definately one of the best v8s I've ever done, and at that point it was the best thing I'd tried to date, also the hardest thing sent thus far in the trip.
Bleau's Art:
18th - 19th When things got interesting...Given my complete lack of skin, and Bob being in the same boat and not feeling too perky we took a rest day, and explored Drei Zinnen, as I thought it looked pretty sick in the 7s and 8s book, also very importantly having the essential 'dries quickly'next to its name, it didn't disappoint, and looked great. We put Bob's less thank 100%ness down to malnutrition or something else, maybe as a result of meals like this for nearly a month?...

Mmmm, brits abroad campfood!
The next morning we walked back to the car from the bivvy, anticipating a good breakfast, and another muggy day, only to find that some little $%^& had broken into the car, stealing all of our bulky stodgefoods! Apparently the kleptomaniac carb-loader only like oats, pasta, rybread, rice, and my essential pot of chilli-spice mix, they left the stove, clothes, climbing shoes etc! We figured that they could have been one of two things; a starving cthief with a good conscience, thus avoiding anything that wasn't essential for them to stay alive, or just a complete knob, we couldn't decide which, but looked at everyone for the rest of the trip with eyes and minds clouded by suspicion!
To cap of the day Bob discovered he had some brutal shits going on, and felt pretty bad, he rated them at at least hard 7a+, and they involved quite an endurance factor, proving heavy on the legs, due to the 10s of times they forced him to go off for a squat.
we took another rest day as you'd imagine, Bob for medical reasons and me because the loss of my 1kg of good quality wholemeal pasta which I'd been saving as a 'treat' for the last week of the trip had hit me hard, and the loss of my put of home made spicemix had crippled me psychologically even further.
20th, Chateauveau The weekend heralded things looking up a bit for a few reasons:
1. The conditions were
perfect, cool fresh, dry and sunny!
2. My mum got worried about my health and sent me a present in the form of a transfer of a few quid to my account, heralding the end of my 1 euro a day budget for food expenditure.
3. Bob was no longer suffering from the dreaded 'drippy botty'.
4. I tried some shithot problems!
Chateauveau was a walkable distance away from our home campsite at the carpark, it's a small area in the woods behind some houses between 95.2 and Gorge au Chats, the reason I wanted to go was one 2star 7b called EOS, which looked amazing.
I managed to have a complete epic on it, hitting the 'thank god' finish jug an hour in, and slipping off due to it being damp (not really an excuse, this thing is huge!), a further good hour and a bit later I finally sent the problem, so exhausted by this oint that I was taking 15 minute rests between attempts. Thoroughly worth it though, amaaaaaaaaaazing moves, real diversity from bottom to top, despite it again being a fairly short route, and powerful all the way to the finish hold.
Powered by success psyche I tried and managed the 7a mantle next door to it, and a surprisingly tricky overhang on the way back to the car, I should've sent both first go, but was pretty weak by this stage.
EOS 7B
Perlim 7a
Zigzag 7a
EOS:

21st - Rest+wet 22nd - Drei ZinnenGiven the precipitation onslaught of the previous day we headed to the fast drying Drei zinnen, I had a problem in mind but it was wet, and bob was interested in a very pinchey pockety 7B called Diversion Assis, which I thought looked like the tits as well, he was also rocketing a brand new sport-climbing weight thanks to his rectal detox.
We spent a while workign out beta on the problem, Bob preferring to do some toe-trickery and drop-knee egyptiany tye things, whilst I preferred a front on thug-it-fast method, for both of us the crux became getting a snatchy move from a powerful pinch right handed stabbing your left at an amazing but quite precise 2 finger pocket, which was a perfect hold, but only just big enough to get in.
The move became harder as the powerful pinch got greased up (mostly by Bob's sweaty mits) and we were both having increasing difficulties on the move, however with darkness came completely freezing temperatures, and the hold improved greatly, we were also taking longer rests by this point, as we were pretty tired, also, despite being light as a feather Bob's body unsurprisingly was wasn't quite yet in tip-top condition after his toilet visit focused Friday, and each attempt was taking more and more out of him.
I decided to give it 5 more goes (not that this is something I regularly manage to stick to on short problems) with headtorch post rest, and a slight change in beta, changing a cut loose fast then go gently move to a gently move feet up, then use the saved energy to thug the following moves faster with less feet and more burl, which worked out and I managed to send the problem in the dark, which always feels a bit special.
23rd - Gorge aux ChatsRefusing to take rest days at this stage to the fickle nature of the weather we took what the skies threw at us (today being cold temps and only a little damp from the previous night) and headed to our local fast drier, and home of a load of quality 7as.
Bob sent the dodgey-landing ridden Anar Chic (6c+/7a)
I managed a flash of one 7a+, which was either soft or my style, another which was definately my style, and got 2 more 7as in a few tries, aided by the increasingly good conditions.
Flashed: La ritournelle, Neige d'Autumn
Sent: Plats de Saison, les mains pleins
24th - GaC AgainA successful day and 2 days on had completely removed my skin, I took a rest day, and returned to Gorge aux Chats for bob to try Sa Pelle Au Logis (7a), which he despatched pretty quickly, and I managed to snag a video of, this problem really is a complete must for anyone going to the crag, which itself is a complete must for anyone going to font at a time when the weather isn't perfect.
Sa Pelle au Logis - 7a
25th - Let it snow let it snow let it snow! Rest day, font was beautiful, bloody cold!
There was snow on the ground (and many of the problems) for the rest of the trip, chilly times! Cooking became pretty brutal as well.
26th 95.2 YYFYI returned to try Sans Dessus Dessous, which had been tried 3 times already, and I'd seen on the first day of the trip, getting fairly far on it, but just not feeling strong enough, since then I'd gone backwards on it (due to minute changes in hand positioning making the crux heelhook less steady it turns out) and had also managed to drop the last easy moves due to not being able to see holds in the dark!
After some beta changing, and careful resting I sent the problem, which is undoubtedly one of the best I've ever tried in my life, and also contains what is possibly the hardest and most powerful single move(definitely heelhook) I've done so far in climbing. Upon returning home and vimeoing it it turns out the normal method is to take a massive swing from a low toehook, I tried this on the first session and deemed it impossible (for me at least, but there were other, better climbers than me there who couldn't hold it either).
Sans Dessus Dessous:

Also managed to get a video so here it is:
Vimeo27th - 28th We checked out Bois De Long Vaux the next day, my god everything was hard, nothing to report on this one :)
On the sunday Wigg and Phil arrived, having both flashed 7b on 2 hours sleep as their warm up in cuvier it was clear that they'd both been training pretty hard! We met up with them while they were trying the popular set of highballs, which Phil crushed pretty convincingly, despite some holds being a big muggy from snow dampness, they were far beyond Bob and myself, so we headed off and did a pretty classi sit to an arrete at la Reconnaisance 'Anglaphobie' (7a).
The next day we returned to Le Cul de Chien to look at arabesque, which it turns out was covered in snow, we broomed it off but it was damp, not to mention the pockets were filled with ice... We headed on to the easily missed Roche aux Oiseau with Wigg and Phillis, which was just as snowy, but owered by psyche as ever phil cleaned of a 7c+ and got pretty close on it, trying till he'd opened up a blood blister on his palm, as is his way. His send for the day was repeating Ty Landmans clapping pullup.
Phil on the Crux:

What a pair of wizards!

We all headed to their gite for the 2nd night running, enjoying some good food my 2nd shower for the whole trip, and bob's first, which was very welcome, and much warmer than the tap we'd been washign under in a carpark.
30th - All Good things must come to an endOn the last day we headed to look at arabesque again, it hadn't snowed that night, and the rock was in perfect condition, apart from 2 pockets entirely filled with ice.. Bob was all up for sacking it off and heading straight to Cuvier, as he wanted to try L'abattoir, we decided to split the day in 2, giving me a couple of hours to de-ice and climb Arabesque, which was goign to be hard in the -5 conditions. However after 1 hour spent lying on the top of the boulder, rubbing the pockets with my freezing thumbs and chalking, and rubbing, and chalking I thought that there'd be enough purchase in the pockets for it to be tryable, as long as there was a layer of chalk between my fingers and the ice in the holds. I stepped onto the crux, and managed to send it first try, feeling quite good on the moves, and not too hampered by the ice in the pockets. It was definitely on, doing this problem on the last day in the snow would make my trip, so I promised myself I'd run my body into the ground if that's what it took to do it. I took a rest, re-pressed chalk into the holds on top of the ice and pulled on and sent it, one of the best climbing experiences I've ever had, and the perfect end to the trip.
We packed up and headed to Cuvier, by this point it was -8, and it felt it, also L'abattoir is nails! Neither of us were successful on it, so we packed up, made our lunch and headed off home to catch the ferry, bye bye font.
Well that was epic, but so was the trip.
Bored of picture uploading now, I'll shove some more up when I've got time, back to work soon though :(